Around Mother’s Day you see lots of posts of appreciation and it makes you count your blessings.

My blessings take many shapes and to keep from leaving anyone out I would like to focus on one person in this post-  my husband.

He came swooping into my life at a time that I was ready for someone reliable that could take on me –  one with a very strong willed personality and my four very different kids.

When we met, it was like instant chemistry.  It’s hard to explain but I knew he was the one for me.  The feelings were quickly returned when he said he has never felt like this before with anyone, ever.  I believe him because I feel the same way. 

He is the calm in my storm that “gets me.”  After my previous dysfunctional relationship full of fighting based on us being a total mismatch, we also had bouts of jealousy, greed and cheating, I didn’t know how to operate in a “grown up” relationship. 

We literally spend our first three years together without fighting.  We really valued one another and felt a deep connection of love without the need to fight.  Now that we are married we do fight but it’s healthy arguing where we resolve our differences or agree to disagree based on opinions.

Here is the part that makes my heart melt.  There is no game playing here.  Trust is complete.  We were both victims of a total mismatch in our prior marriage and in my case I was cheated on.  

The feelings of being cheated on can make you feel crazy, and unloveable.  I actually had someone elude that I “asked for it”.  Truth be told my ex didn’t respect me or our relationship and that was never going to change.  That lack of respect is not what I wanted my children to learn.  

Today, sometimes the green monster comes out because my old feelings of inadequacy come bubbling to the surface.  However our relationship is solid and not going about to be ruined by an intruder.  

We won’t let it and my level of trust is unwavering.  

In the years that we were dating I The exact moment and place where I realized I didn’t have to worry about being cheated on or any of the mind games from my past relationships.  I remember exactly where we were and it was just drivinf in the car.  The  feeling of 100% trust came washing over me.  It was such a comfort.  

I always wonder and sometimes even wish we had met many years ago, but we wouldn’t have our blended family of 6 kids.  We also may not have valued each other having been in a dysfunctional, mismatch of a relationship.  

I often wonder if our kids think that their parents will ever get back together.  In our case I can assure you when you meet your soulmate, the past is over.  There is no going back.

Never ever settle.  If you are a mismatch like I was, your gut is screaming and you need to listen.  You know you and your future children deserve more.
Always express gratitude.  It doesn’t take much and makes a big difference!