It’s a normal feeling that people have from time to time, in their lives when they feel unsure of themselves.  The secret is not giving in and approaching it with a new set of lenses! 

Do you really want what someone else has?  If you really break it down, you might want some of it but not all.  Try changing your perspective.

Many, many years ago a friend of mine and her husband were able to afford a really nice custom home when we were still in our starter home. My immediate reaction was jealousy until I really, really thought it through.

I put myself in her shoes and thought, “would I really want this new house?”  The answer was yes and No.  I would love a big nice house like she had but we honestly couldn’t afford it.  Her house plan was great for them, but if I was able to design a custom home, I realized my plan would have been different. Even though I kept that thought to myself, it REALLY helped me be less jealous! 

I thought about why they were able to afford something we could not. Her husband was blessed to work for his families thriving business and made more money than we did. In contrast we started our own company and we weren’t the second generation enjoying the fruits of the earlier generation as we were still struggling. 

Our situation was no reason to be jealous or mad at them.  They were blessed!

We were invited over to see their new house with a group of other friends. I overheard one of them saying snide comments like “Ouch, my neck hurts! Your house is so tall I couldn’t see your whole house, as we pulled in the driveway, ha ha ha.”  That comment struck me as rude and unnecessary. 

At that moment, I decided to do something I had never tried before, I was genuinely happy for my friend. 

Normally I would have joined in the fun and created my own snide comment. Instead, I went up to my friend and said “I love your new home and I am so happy for you.” She immediately smiled and gave me a big hug.  I noticed that in time, our bond and friendship grew from that and the other friends that were making snide comments, eventually faded.

If you let the green eyed monster in, you become negative and hard to be around. How can you change this mindset around?  Can you be genuinely happy for someone else?  Try it!  You will be amazed at how it can turn around your feelings, your friendship and you will really feel like your have grown from the experience.

Are you behaving in a way that you would be proud of when looking back?  

Not everyone can possibly be good at everything or as financially successful as my friend, but we can expand on what our talents are and be the best we can be.  That we can control.

Keep the green eyed monster out of your life in exchange for happiness.